mattmanna/blog

Tweets posted from October 11, 2009 thru October 17, 2009.

• From the Modern Marketers Dictionary: A Sidekick – The resultant shift in market share after a serious gaffe. (http://bit.ly/sgcqy)
• Advice to business speakers: The term ‘loosely engaged’ should be carefully considered before addressing an audience of wedding planners.
• Attention unseasoned joke writers. This is as easy as it gets. (http://bit.ly/q1NJV)
• Governments don’t plan, they scheme.
• A communication medium may not determine how the brain works. But it does determine how the brain is working.
• Journalist – A peddler of decontextualized messages, well suited to a particular medium, designed to elicit a predetermined response.
• My clothes are dirty. The interweb seems to be a place where folks routinely do others’ laundry. So, anyone want to do my laundry?

Tweets posted from October 4, 2009 thru October 10, 2009.

• The funny, smart, sometimes oracular Graham Chapman died twenty years ago today. A lamentable day – nope! Life of Brian DVD is on the tube.
• A sales projection meeting that includes the word “if” is ≈ a Vegas conjuring act. What is being projected onto the future is bias, not sales.
• A sad day! (http://bit.ly/27zbpW)
• If you’re a ‘pro blogger’ upset with having to tell the truth then you’re not a pro blogger.
• Testing, testing this is a test. Is twitter in the midst of a no whale fail?
• Nobel Prize committee members must be the type of people who flap their arms inside of an airplane thinking it helps the thing to fly.

Tweets posted from September 27, 2009 thru October 3, 2009.

• What a product does technically is minor when compared to what our mind does with that product.
• At this weekends photo-shoot my client requested Lyle Lovett music. Tickle Toe & Here I Am was put on repeat. Almost refused my fee. Almost.
• Agree or disagree with ‘em, it’s always a good thing when people who say they love San Francisco live there.
• Editing your own writing is like having a room full of fun house mirrors inserted into your brain.
• It’s maddening that folks can tweet their Google Wave experience before I’m “invited” to try it. Large, limited releases stink.
• It ought to be illegal for an urologist to invite you to dinner right after he tells you he is an urologist.

Tweets posted from September 20, 2009 thru September 26, 2009.

• Today on Imperial You – Five popularity heightening techniques that will not turn your art into artifice.
• Buy insurance or pay the government. Calling that a tax is dangerously kind. It’s really a vomitous, black-hearted example of racketeering.
• This is a little inside baseball, but remember dear friends (you know who you are): Jack Kilby = microchip. Jack Kirby = comic book.
• It’s usually worth the considerable effort required to appreciate mathematics & the French. Usually.
• Sat in (for a bit) on a meeting in which the phrases “Absence makes the heart…” & “Out of sight out of…” were said about the same thing.
• Like Neil Young or hate Neil Young? That is the only question capable of revealing the essence of a human being.
• Goalies are so thickheaded they actually try to catch the flu. Hi yo!

Tweets posted from September 13, 2009 thru September 19, 2009.

• Phone rang as I was walking past a coffee shop. Thought it was my lab assistant with new evidence. But it was just Mom with dinner details.
• L5, L6, S1 rupture. Is there an app for that?
• Separation of church & state is a good idea. Separation of health care & state is a better idea. Separate the make believe and the real.
• Playing golf is a sufficient validation of a handicap. I see no purpose in a number system to measure its severity.
• Today on Imperial You – Join Anna & Dirk for tips on how to maintain your personal influence in today’s ever changing group dynamic.

Tweets posted from September 6, 2009 thru September 12, 2009.

• Photographers know a lot about lights and even more about light.
• The amount of well-being in a society is inversely proportional to the size of government. Has there ever been an exception?
• Sad to hear that Larry Gelbart has died.
• Wish I was part of the group in Washington D.C. Never thought I would say that. But, it’s true. #tlot #tcot
• It can’t be an accident that kluge rhymes with stooge.
• Behavior comes from a haphazard assembly of so many neurons that it’s stinking tricky to predict what will happen next. But it’s fun trying.

“You know Hatch, to be honest, you don’t kick well. You don’t dribble well. But you could be a good goalie.” That is how Pele, the best player in the history of the game, detailed the position of goalie in the movie Victory. The film received a PG rating in 1981 when it was released. I’m sure the rating would have been R if Pele had been allowed to properly express the feelings all soccer players hold regarding goalies.

Goalies hate everyone and everything except for gloves. They love gloves. They spend more time with gloves than they do with a ball. They wear gloves before the game, after the game and in the shower. I’ve seen goalies at social events wearing gloves. At least gloves cover the knuckles, most of which, when it concerns goalies, are raw from dragging the ground.

Goalies wear knee length ’shorts’ and long sleeve shirts. Most wear shoes that are fastened by velcro. I’m told that’s because the gloves make it impossible to tie laces. At least that’s what they say.

When it comes to the game, goalies are soccer players only in an academic sense. Sure they stand (not run) on the field, but they don’t play the game. They play at playing the game. Sometimes they kick the ball but usually they punt it. Punting a soccer ball is not the same as kicking a soccer ball.

Goalies bark directions, blame somebody else when the ball gets by them and feel lost when they travel beyond a 18 yard by 44 yard parcel of pitch.

There is no such thing as a change of destiny with regards to goalies. It’s like trying to change the destiny of bugs at a picnic. They buzz around until someone has enough and squashes them. That’s no big deal, it’s only a goalie, bug.

Last week my niece played her first soccer game. In the first quarter she was asked what position she wanted to play. “Goalie,” was the answer. She refused to wear gloves. There’s hope.

Tweets posted from September 1, 2009 thru September 5, 2009.

• The universal correct response to every question that starts, “What is the best,” is Fool In The Rain.
• The Three Stooges is the exception that proves the opposites attract rule.
• Goalies are to soccer what drummers are to music; only with slightly shorter hair and thicker gloves.
• Hitting a bulls eye with a dart requires skill. Throwing a dart & painting a bulls eye around it less so. A pro must be the former.
• Canon 7D video footage available here. (http://bit.ly/1lQRMp)

Tweets posted from July 27, 2009 thru August 31, 2009.

• Carnac says, “2.” – Rip, blow. – “Name the number of NBC talk show hosts that will be off the air within one year.” Ed, “Hi yo!”
• It’s impossible to fully trust anyone who dislikes Ray Bradbury.
• During the first week of fall term, the hallways of a junior college smell more like Target than Target.
• If web design was a Sherlock Holmes production I wish it would go more Jeremy Brett and less Basil Rathbone.
• Talk about your true descender. This is the sexiest site I’ve seen all year. Please don’t judge me too harshly. (http://typedia.com/)
• Information without understanding is useless. The ability to store & recall data is not a measure of either intelligence or wisdom.
• I don’t want to force you to help fund my purchase of a car or health insurance. This also makes me feel good about myself.
• I don’t want to be forced to help fund the purchase of a strangers car or health insurance. This makes me feel good about myself.
• Trying to smile for photographer who says my color is green. Was hoping for purple. Even beige is better than yucky, mucky, unlucky green.
• Here is the health care bill, H.R.3200, in PDF format (http://bit.ly/5SknX). This is a must read and totally terrifying.

Tweets posted from June 8, 2009 thru July 26, 2009.

• Is an artificial brain 10 years from now (http://bit.ly/5SknX) such a big deal when we already have a make believe brain in the White House?
• It would be easier for me to keep Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill straight if one of them was funny.
• Centralizing available resources in order to deal with a large, lumbering lot of people will only increase the lot & decrease the resources.
• Thinking about a diet because my niece and nephew asked me to play the title role in a game they call Free Willy.
• There’s nothing more galling then a talented accordion player.
• Doesn’t matter if they are green, yellow, red or purple with pink polka-dots, I am in favor of using natural resources to make life better.
• Money, time & talent are the only resources we have to achieve success. Time/money are available to all & are talents constants companions.
• There is no liberty in choosing who will force me to do what I am not persuaded to do.
• The second biggest obstacle to success is the need to be right. The biggest is government.
• Folks who say perception is reality are often credited as understanding both. The reality is they don’t understand either.
• No social networking service can move beyond the level of fad until its list of “Suggested Users” has Albert Brooks as its number one entry.
• Technology makes it easy to imagine the impossible, provided you keep people out of the equation. Government too.
• When it comes to pumpernickel butt roast coffee, the stuff I had at this mornings conference was the most pumpernickelly butt roasty ever.
• Very important use of twitter: “My iPhone wont activate after attempting an upgrade to 3.0″ Oops!
• Least important use of twitter I can think of: “Totally downloading iPhone 3.0 right now.” Oops!
• Most of us feel before we think, and most of what we think is what we feel. Haven’t yet been able to work out if this is a good or bad deal.
• Today on Imperial You – How to raise the bar without lowering your standards.
• “You know Hatch, to be honest, you don’t kick well. You don’t dribble well. But you could be a good goalie.” I love Victory.
• Photography tip of the day. Don’t carry groceries and a camera from a car to a house at the same time!